The Gospel of Mark: Divorce

He left that place and went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan. And crowds again gathered around him; and, as was his custom, he again taught them.

Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her.” But Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you. But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

Then in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. He said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” ~ Mark 10:1-12


I was standing in the narthex one Sunday many years ago chatting with a woman from the congregation. It was before the service and she had seen what the gospel reading was the day. It was either this one, or one of the other similar readings from Luke or Matthew about divorce.

She sighed pretty heavily and shook her head. "I hate this reading."  She hated the guilt that came with this text. Every time she heard it, she wanted to shrink down in her pew. Somewhere along the line, some preacher had condemned or shamed her: maybe not personally, but as a divorced woman, she felt the condemnation regardless.

I was preaching that day and during my sermon, I owned up to being divorced as well. I also promised a word of grace here from Jesus: this text is actually progress for women. Until this point, they could be divorced from their husbands for any reason whatsoever.

But do you see the implication here from Jesus? Here, not only can a woman not be so casually dismissed, but she also has some agency herself: she can be the one who divorces. For Jesus, divorce was not something men could use against a woman as punishment.

Of course, he is also clear that divorce is not the desire of God. Marriage - partnership, faithfulness - is God's expectation for humankind.

But there was no condemnation here for woman I spoke with. When I saw her after the service, I could see relief clearly written on her face. It helped her immensely to know that I too had been divorced.

But it helped her even more to know that God's judgment on divorce was not one meant to convict.

It was instead meant to free: to free us to be in relationship that was healthy and whole, where one partner could not take advantage of the other, but instead both lived to love and care for each other.


Holy God, thank you for the gospel - the good news - of your Son. Open my mind and heart to this good news and enliven me with your Spirit of servanthood that I might share this good news with a world in need. Amen


Engagement Questions:


Have you been divorced? Has anyone in your family? What are your feelings about it? If you have been divorced, how have you been treated as a result?

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